Ever since the election of Barack Obama in 2008, the world has become a much safer and peaceful place. The Arab Spring brought democracy to a region badly in need of Obama’s vision and greatness, and in 2009 when the students in Iran revolted against the Mullahs, Obama stood silent and indirectly supported the ruling regime in Iran, why? Well because, Obama knows everything, and that was the right thing to do to secure Iran’s respect in the future. Unfortunately a pretty student by the name of Neda was fatally shot in cold blood in the street, but what’s a few sacrifices, right? And today, Iran is as you expect with a great leader like Obama in charge – a country that respects us and is at peace with us:
Hundreds of thousands of people marched on Sunday in Tehran and other cities chanting “Death to America” as Iran marked the 34th anniversary of the Islamic revolution that ousted the U.S.-backed shah.
In addition to Iran, after deposing their leader and bringing about democracy, Libya welcomed us by assassinating our Ambassador along with three others. This must have come as a big surprise to Obama and his very capable SecState Hillary Clinton, because they were so confident that Libya was on the road to peace that they didn’t even fortify the Embassy and ignored cables from the Ambassador asking for protection. It was all a big surprise, but the regime has imprisoned a California film maker, so at least we have addressed the problem. I mean “what difference does it make”, right? Other countries that have embraced the forward thinking vision of Obama include Mali, Sudan, Yemen, and of course Egypt where it all began with Obama’s unifying speech in Cairo. Women everywhere must have been delighted to hear the leader of the free world extend an olive branch to those men who oppress, beat and stone them to death.
Domestically, after endearing the nation by telling conservatives that they would have to “ride in the back of the bus”, by telling the Hispanic caucus to “punish their enemies”, and by calling his grandmother a “typical white person”, Obama has proceeded to bring us all even more together by increasing poverty, expanding the food stamp rolls, and increasing taxes on everyone. And speaking of women, I am sure that all American women are ecstatic to know that their leader thinks so highly of them that he doesn’t want them over burdened with a pregnancy, including his daughters, so killing that fetus really is the only option even if it does make it outside the womb. After all, I can’t think of any other choice a woman could make, can you? Obama certainly has unified us all, hasn’t he? We are all in this decline together. Isn’t it great!