I’ll make some predictions for 2013:
Does the fact that we’re entering the teens mean we’ll become moody and easily depressed?
Just wait till next year! A thing always said by Chargers fans. As they went 7-9 this season, they are keeping to their usual level. But, the other thing all Chargers fans say – next year we’ll be 14-2 and go on to win the Super Bowl!
Chris Christie will be re-elected governor of New Jersey. He’ll immediately be talked up as the front-runner for the 2016 GOP nomination. This will be completely ignored by the Republican leadership who will be on the lookout for someone much more moderate and centrist than those crazy, TEA Party right-wingers we nominated in 2008 and 2012.
New York City Council Speaker (its that large that it needs a Speaker?) Christine Quinn, if she decides to run, will be elected Mayor of New York…unless she winds up squaring off with potential GOP candidate, and former Madam, Kristin M. Davis. Given a choice between a political hack who will run on the fact that she’s gay and a madam, I think New Yorkers might go for the madam.
It will be announced some time in March or April that we are back in recession…just about the time we start to emerge from it (it started back in July or so).
When the I-pad 5 gets released I’ll once again fail to rush out and buy it.
The Syrian Civil War will come to a (temporary) end as the Assad regime crumbles…Civil War II will involve a battle between barbarians to decide who gets to rule over the carcass.
Hillary will be forced to cancel her Benghazi testimony over a terrible case of the hiccups.
In an effort to stave off bankruptcy, California will offer to sell Bakersfield to Nevada. Nevada will counter with an offer to cut cards for double or nothing.
In order to keep his promise for openness and transparency in his Administration, Obama will propose the creation of a Ministry of Truth.
Iran will announce that the earth-shattering kaboom was most emphatically not a nuclear test.
Obama will believe them.
The Department of Health and Human Services will announce that celibate religious orders will be required to provide health insurance covering birth control. Oh, wait…that was a 2012 prediction.
Did the 2012 apocalypse disappoint you? Well, cheer up: only 3 years left until the Gorpocalypse!
What are your predictions for 2013?
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